Tuesday, December 22, 2015

The Mysteries of an Internal Compass


The Mysteries of an Internal Compass

This afternoon on my walk, er, stroll, actually, I went sans music.
I heard squirrels scurrying away in the underbrush.
I discovered my "hawk" was actually a mockingbird 
masquerading as a blue-jay most likely.
I heard numerous planes overhead, but due to the cloud cover, couldn't spot them.
And I heard geese.

I have long held a fascination with geese and their navigational skills.
I have not researched and investigated due to the fact I enjoy the magic of not knowing.
I couldn't see them, but could tell by their calls they were circling.
Perhaps the dense cloud cover confuses their internal compasses as well.

I have a love/hate relationship with my internal compass.
It's often called the Still, Small Voice, referring to the Holy Spirit indwelling Christian believers.
Others call it the gut, intuition, soul, heart of hearts, and any other numerous names.
To-may-to, to-mah-to.  To me it's one in the same.

The questions I should ask myself is, do I ask of it and do I listen to it?
If I will retreat to the quiet stillness of my thinking spot and ask, it WILL answer.
This is a great opportunity.  Is it a great opportunity for me?
This relationship/friendship has possibilities.  Should I invest my time/energy?
Should I or shouldn't I?
It always answers in truth.

Do I like the answer?
Ha, ha!  Most of the time if I have to retreat and ask, I want my desire, not the truth.
 Sometimes I'm searching for guidance, looking for reassurance I'm on the right track.
Other times I want permission and justification for the wrong track.
Why don't I listen more?

It has never once led me astray.
Sometimes the answer is yes. Sometimes no. Sometimes wait. 
Sometimes it just laughs at me.
I often run astray by not asking and ignoring the niggling feeling that I should be asking.
The knowing I'm on the wrong path and either enjoying my folly or scared to turn around.
The confidence that I'm in the right place at the right time or
in the wrong place at the wrong time. Or even more confusing, 
the right place at the wrong time.

Cultivating an understanding of my internal compass is a journey I'm currently undertaking.
I have mixed reviews thus far.
It's calling for me to end some relationships.
It's calling for me to proceed towards others.
However, when I listen, it always calls for me to act.  

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